10 songs

i bet i can find 10 songs to describe my life before you do.

1-Absolutely (Story of a Girl) [Nine Days]
2-Boston [Augustana]
3-With You [Jessica Simpson]
4-Yesterday [Atmosphere]
5-My Love/ Just Friends [Passion]
6-Nothing Lasts Forever [Maroon 5]
7-She Will Be Loved [Maroon 5]
8-Never Never Land [Lyfe Jennings]
9-No Such Thing [John Mayer]
10-Stop and Stare [OneRepublic]
11- Use Somebody [Kings of Leon]
12- Trippin [Zion I]
13-Well Done [Passion]
14-Who I am Hates Who I've been [Relient K]
15-A Thousand Miles [Vanessa Carlton]
16-Breakaway [Kelly Clarkson
17-Drops of Jupiter [Train]
18-Flavor of Life [....]
19-Half Life [Duncan Sheik]
20-Like You'll Never See Me Again [Alicia Keys]
21-Killing me Softly
22-Mr Nice Guy [Manny Garcia]
23-The Trouble With Love Is [Kelly Clarkson]
24-The Man Who Can't Be Moved [The Script]
25-Far Away [Nickelback]
26-The APL Song {BEP]
27-Where Is the Love [BEP]
28-Photograph [Nickelback]
...TBC..lateron. maybe.


gah.
must only have 10....


1-Absolutely (Story of a Girl) [Nine Days]
2-Boston [Augustana]
3-The APL Song [BEP]
4-Nothing Lasts Forever [Maroon 5]
5-She Will Be Loved [Maroon 5]
6-Never Never Land [Lyfe Jennings]
7-No Such Thing [John Mayer]
8-Stop and Stare [OneRepublic]
9-Who I am Hates Who I've been [Relient K]
10-Mr Nice Guy [Manny Garcia]
....
11-Killing me Softly -the sentimentalish...one o.o



[= i winnnnnn.
yay

new blogs

i have 2 new blog...things. places. lol

leahquill.blogspot.com
for my cardinal quill submissions
+ later.. i will change it... to something else,
but leave it up.
probly thewordsofleah or something.

AND

leah10.blogspot.com
its my day in 10 words or less.
i think this would be interesting.
[=
cant wait to white about my day tmrw.


hes... in the car.
real far...
i bet he can see stars.
oh!
the other day we saw mars
rawr.


x.x

reply to ... blahblahblah

you dont fail.
nothing you're doing is complicating anything.
maybe the rest of my life is, but not you.

how do you feel like you're rushing it or overdoing it?
because im not so sure.
the way i see it, its fine..
but i dont really know,

i look at the stuffs that i had before.
and those... were rushed.
but i dunno.
its fine.


hmm.. falling?
;]

is that wat luat is telling you?
hes telling me something else =X

the maybes.
they always play a role in relationships.
the maybes and what ifs.

and i really like the fact that we can laugh about it in the end too.
i was thinking that afterwards. o.o wen i got in the car.
and blaaaaah.

we will still... see o.o



------

and... are they like... together or something?!?!?
C/A? or just idk... its o.o not weird. no maybe a little.
but yea. can i get a clarification on that.

From Cardinal Quill 2001-2002

KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOR
"One Day
I will come back for you
After I have figured out
all thte answers
Saving you has always been
A dream to me
To give each other a chance
For a new beginning
Throughout life
The tables have turned against us
But time and again
We have been there for each other
All the negative in my world
Has been opposed by you
I'd be dishonest if I didn't tell you
I owe you my happiness
So on the day you think
The world is going to end
And you have no way of getting out
That will be the day
When i will come back for you"
-James Ortiz


a Rose....
"A rose is a flower that every one loves to smell. Inside of the rose it goes around and around until it ends.
A rosa can be any kind of color. It can be red, yellow, white, or pink. It can be tall or short. It also can be any kind of shape or size. A rosa is very silent and it whispers when the wind blows, but it always sits still during the summer. It's color changes in each season. A rosa is a sign of love or friendship. Its stem is long and green and it also has thorns to protect itself. Its leaves fall down when the winter or summer comes in. It falls to the ground It falls until it hits the ground. Some people even rip off the leaves too. The ground helps the rosa to stand on itself so it can live."
-Tina Iv





TBC.

tmrw is my last fantastics

and there arent much people who care.
go freshmen ;D
lol, anyways...

i think its cute.
wats going on. its cute.
im happier now.
than.. u know before.

even tho all these stressful x.x crap stuff are happening at the same time.
its fine.


someone asked me to their prom. from a different school.
but im busy that week.. and i dont really think i want to go...o.o
really at all.
so i turned him down.
and only ONE person knows.
XD the reaction was funny tho.

oh wells,
hes just my friend. o.o
thas all,



phone.
[=
o.o


i found this really nice playlist i like.
http://www.playlist.com/playlist/19250525451?utm_source=homepage&utm_medium=feature&utm_campaign=MBYtwinmill712

theres alota random songs.
x.x
meow.



chicago today.
i had a fight con my mom..-ish
about saturday
and driving,... and blah.

then i asked her about watching the play with me.
which i told her yesterday.
and she forgot x.x
so im going with Wik.
interesting.




ATEH SHERYL<3
i cant wait.

the first day of spring.

was wonderful. [=


i got a full nights sleep last night. i slept at around 10 and woke up around 7... [but fell asleep again for a good.... hour D=]
picked up jennie and marvin and went to meadow fair community center. for litter pick up community service required by FYC for battle points. o.o
and from our school, me jovey jennie nathaniel marvin and ken

we went down one street x.x and realized... there were hella ppl in this area.
so we went to the area near my house [because of my suggestion? / because i said lol]
uhm... we got there.. and we split boys and girls.
then... an hour later we see a who bunch of other people with those neon green vests walking down the same way we came from.

fail on their part i guess x.x we cleaned the area really well.
and then we did took a bathroom break and my house..
AND I FOUND OUT I GOT INTO UOP!!!!!!!
i got so happy [=
cuz thats my 2nd choice school.
and its the one ill be going to.
[Berklee.... isnt too realistic right now]
then went to welch to pick up trash there.

after a 10 min or so break.... swings :D and lying down...
we headed back to the community center to drop off our stuff.
[bags, gloves, vests, armthingy...etc]

then drop off people
then CVC.

D= i thot we'd still be able to make some of the practices.
but i guess not.
its ok tho, we helped out afterwards.
:D i helped make a cloud!
with chi and eric.
sorta,
the cloud was cut out on cardboard
we just traced, cut and taped paper onto it.
and jovey painted it :D

then blahblahblah
me and jovey went to in n out.
[= fun.
joveyleahtime.


then we went back and blah.

*inserts thoughts
-i really like your hugs.
the way i feel is.... hard to explain?
but i like em.
hahaha, they're hella long.
and meaningful.
and comfortable.
[=
and i got a couple today.
it made me extra happy.
-----
i told you i had a weird dream with you in it..
but i..didnt tell you everything.
we were in 'SF' right?
and we got outta that crazy car that could drive on water..
and we went into this hotel
and walked around with the other random people.
i cant really remember everything about it.
but then we faced each other and i remember the was an archway towards a room behind you. and i remember shelley and other ppl im not sure.. were in there... painting o.o on the floor.
and then yea. so we're facing each other.
and then =*

yea... multiple times..
and then the dream continued.
i dont remember much after that...

but really...
its the first time i dream about.... kissing someone.
if im not actually with that person.
just an interesting thing i thot of the whole day.

because... idk. it was a very strange dream.
*end thoughts.



theeeen my mom picked me up
and we went home.

then i got bored started my laundry and played piano

then ROSA CAME :D
because we were planning to record something for her school... for IB[?]
and stuff.

so yea.
i missed rosa alottttttt.
i was happy wen she got there.
lol ask her and my mom.
it was like
"OMGGGGGGG ITS WOOOOOSAAAAA"
hugsforevertimesinfinity.

and we had hella laughs today.
but decided.
we ultimately fail and will continue this on monday.
[i will skip musicman for her] x.x
cuz its due on wednesday...

then she left... pianopiano.
laundry.


and this.




x.x tmrw
10/11-2pm kasama officer meeting
2-5pm CVC practice
6-8 church





x.x where does hw go?

NOWHEREEEEEEEE
x.x




D+ i learned when batlle is this year.

... its the day after pops concerts D=

heres my may schedule [id rather not look at april x.x =[ ]

may 1- full ap calc simulation
may 5- ap calc test
may 8- prom [=
may 10-senior ditch day
may 19- senior vs staff basketball [kasama]
may 20- pops concert [last high school concert. MUST BE EPIC]
may 21- battle of the tribes. [we HAVE to win >=O]
may 21... is also cardinal holiday. x.x
...
then i dont really care after that.
lol

tho i think the physics/calc/stats field trip is the 21st which would SUCK.
mr k said hed check... to change it.
=/ i hope its changed!

blogconscious

yea.

exactly.


and im tired right now too.

today wasnt really that special.
but i felt like blogging.
haha.


well, mrs robinson is making us do this lit circle thing.
so each person in our group set up a blogger account
and i have to blog x.x for hw.

it isnt really.. appealing.
but watever.

www.edufa5.blogspot.com

thas my hw. x.x

and... yea...

before i start my hw...

i shall blog about my weekend.
oh geez.

calc test. x.x i was scared. but i got a B :D overall [and on both m/c and essay]
panda express + coldstone w/ mom
then CVC practice
then 'kasama' practice
=O then me and jovey went to Jamba juice.
but like... my mom was there, but i already got in the car and we were driving x.x
so my mom saw me in joveys car wen she was driving it X=
but she dint say anything wen we got back.
i told her where we went and everything XD
oh,
so wen we went to jamba juice.
jovey was all ima make my name... amanda.
o.o so i wanted to change my name too =P
we were hella thinking of things.
from chelsea to...idk.. random stuff.
i ended up using erica.
bwaha.
then we went back and she went home and went to ateh sheryls house to watch the pacquiao fight
by this time it was only... 4pm. x.x
but i was exhausted.
i got there and there wasnt many people
rosa was apposed to come, but she couldnt =[
i miss that girl.
:D at least i got to spend quality time with ateh
i saw her.. cousin[?] and he reminded my of my older brother ryan D=
i miss them. they're coming back in a month. i cant wait! [=
and theyre gonna bring back presents ! muahaha.
uhm
so yea,
this was the first pacquiao fight i watched FULLY.
before ive only watched pieces or some of it. and didnt stay for all of it.
but the first time i watch it.. it sucked =[
the guy didnt even fight back at all... and it lasted all 12 rounds.
we jus watched some guy get beat up by pacman.
and like... in the end. pacquiao threw 832 [or something] more punches than the other guy ! x.x
good food =P
then we watched TV until my mom picked me up around 10:30.

then... home... x.x blahblah, fail attempt to do hw.
practice piano.
... random stuff to get ready for tmrw and the rest of the week
reminded self of daylight savings time.
D= dam loss of an hour of sleep.

i woke up the next morning.. at 6... or now 7
i have no idea why.
i remember i had this really weird dream, but i dont remember wat it was about =/

then church.
then i got a text from ryan about prom practice at 12 x.x
[but church ends around that time. soo rushrushrush afterwards.

i got there wen they were taking a tour of the place.
blahblah.

prom practice. XD funny. its fast, but its cute.
then kasama practice stuff for performance.
then we left.
to gilroy.
in 3 cars.

we passed by really nice/weird/huge houses x.x

i got there first,
it was a nice house.
the lady was throwing a promotion party. o.o
some guy got promoted.
it was ...interesting.
we got there, ate. there was a jumper and a trampoline and a nice lawn and nice weather.
it was nice XD

then we got ready to perform.
auntie wilma [who hired us]
called me saying she was there and she'd send he son over to watch and give us gas money.

tinikling started. it was cool [= people liked it.
then long speech of the people getting promoted. hes filipino :D
then hiphop =X

and wilmas son. was cute ;D
everyone said so.
muahahha.
but i got to talk to him. hehe,
idk if thats ever gonna happen again,
but hey [= i know his mom!
hahahaha jk. -.-

then we took pics .... and eventually left.

ryans car went to sonics
joveys car went home
and
me and my mom went to my nephews birthday party.
it was ok.
not a normal family get together..
because theres alota drama going on in my family =/
i guess it was fine.
x.x more party food.

jeez ive been eating alot.
i should... stop x.x


and yea.
now... i will start hw?
and... we'll see from there.


bye!

its friday.

today,
i was supposed to wake up early so i could go to school early.
cuz my mom needed to go to work early.
but i didnt. x.x i couldnt wake up until 7:45. which is still pretty early for me o.o
but not early enough for my mom, at least she waited for me...
hm, my plan was supposed to be... wake up...
call wik. to ask if he wanted to o.o run... yes run. like.. go running.
[to make up for that one time, i walked all the way up to the track and he asked me to run w. him and i didnt.. cuz i didnt have shorts and i dint wanna run in pants. and blah]..
and then be at school around 7:45/8.
but then again... im not even shure if id want to ask him x.x
maybe itd be too much. idk.
so yea. i got to school... in b/t passing period.
i was late by around a minute because i needed to go to my locker.

choir clean up theater. - some people left because of EVC placement test. they said u had to sign up for the test.. but i only applied i didnt know you had to sign up for the test x.x so i didnt go with them.
band.. clean up theater - during announcements i heard something about prom and seniors and picking up something. but i wasnt sure wat it was o.o
brunch sit.
psychology watch serial killer video.. theres only have the class for some strange reason. then jovey came in and i realized its blood drive day.
english i have alota do next week =/ i needa set up another blogger for the assignment due next monday. and read this long play thing... and find more nonfiction sources for my research project .. then i got a pass to go to the library during 5th or 6th period to do the placement thing. and thats wen i learned once u apply.. u just take the test x.x
so at lunch me and reuben went to the library. and... velez made us come in... [but i left my stuff in k's already D=] and sit and take it. i didnt realize how much i hated tests until today. x.x it was too long. it was easy, but long. i got thru it faster than reuben tho.. maybe its cuz i got a head start by like 5-10min. in the end the score printed out and randy says i did really good. that i can enter straight into english 1a and calculus 1. by that time it was halfway thru 7th period. and i didnt want to end my week in torres's class. i wondered wat to do...
i got out and got my stuff in k's class and walked outside and adrian and chris and jackie and michelle and this one girl ere there. so i asked adrian if he wanted to go early. we were going to but michelle said she still had to go home and get ready... so i was either gonna go to their house or stay. i choose to stay.. because.. yea, i found out jovey wanted to come after all [at the same moment], so id wait for her. i told adrian i would go to torrex x.x then, i passed by the junior quad and saw some guy go into cavadas. :D brilliant idea. i will hang out with L because... i knew hed be in there for some reason... and...yea in my mind hang out with wik. but he wasnt there. L and V were, so i just stayed there and chilled. he was played that one card game on fb and told me about how wik got level12 or something in a day and it took him a week. haha
and yea. then wik called =o
and said something about where was i during lunch and stuff and i guess he was there at lunch too o.o then he said something about picking up gifts for prom thingy. and i dint know.... exactly.. but he got them. o.o idk wat they are..... or why or blah.
ill call him later to find out.
then i had to go cuz jovey got there and we left to Gmall

im so tired.
because we circled the mall like.. a million times.
[not really] more like once or twice but... we went back and forth and throughout stores ALOT.
i got a new tank top.
new bows/stuff for my hair [=
and a new bag.
yay.
good 'relax' afternoon. even tho im pooped x.x


blah.
now time to... study for calc. and maybe read for english [maybe tmrw...]
and call.



tmrw,
calc test.
cvc
[skip sfsu audition- cuz my moms ok with it too o.O]
kasama
sheryls house [=

long-ish day tmrw too.
i might fall asleep at sherys house. gah, i should bring sweats.

p.

i dont wanna sound too overly obsessed or overly engrossed in the thought of going to prom.
[because at the beginning of the year[ish] i wasnt even planning on going]
but ...
wat are we gonna wear??

i mean, thats a pretty legitimate question right?
hm,
ill bring it up with him laterlater,
cuz once again, i dont wanna seem... iurgnoeiufs0diufnsn about it.

[=
oh! i asked him to go watch Up with me.
at the Puente dinner/movie thing.
he said maybe...
which might lead to no.
so i wont expect anything, i guess.

hahaha. yes.
"we'll see".

_____________________________________

on a different note;

yay, last high school spring concert.
fooorreverrrr.
=X
last 'district festival' kinda thing foreverrrrrr.
fun with overfelt and james lick bands.
i saw a couple of old acquaintances like juaquin and ... im not exactly sure about the other ppls names x.x
[=
ONE more concert.
and the next concert has to MINDBLOWING. it has to be SO SUPERLY AWESOME.
that it will never EVER be forgotten in the history of MP music.
forreal.
[adv. choir will agree] -talk session after they performed x.x
anyways.....yea,

tmrw i will go to Gmall to chill with adrian/ jovey[?]
so adrian can... get at? [good choice of words] that one girl.
good luck to him. =/
"window shopping" :D to relax before test.
then study.
then text. then CVC then Kasama.
then kasama performance.
meeting monday.
fyc tuesday
core wednesday
foodfest friday.
community service saturday + Rons birthday...
and the rest of my life will go from there

i thinik i went over this already.
[not exactly shure.. but it feels like it]


:D
night, im not reading like i planned.
im tired.

i think im losing it.

my mind.
im losing it.

i was totally gonna go to the mall with adrian today...
and i forgot about music man AND core.
blah.


so i have all this on my mind.
and its rawr.
like...

family/ new responsibilities
calculus
other school subjects [especially english w/ its research project =/]
music man
band concerts
kasama stuff [outside performances, food fest stuff, fundraisers, senior VS staff]
BATTLE [finance head.... core x.x]
CVC :D [just fashion shows tho]
job....

its SENIOR YEAR DAMMIT.
its our last semester of high school, forever.

and ...
im busy =[



i dun like it.

i guess its my fault.
but honeslty.
im not even signed up for much
just... school, kasama and band/choir/drama thing.
its relatively not much...


hm,
at least after this weekend, itd be a little better.
cuz tmrw is band concert
saturday is calc. / SFSU audition?
sunday is kasama outside performance.

then after that...19th is food festival
20th attend thing... for battle points.
20th = Rons birthday :D
i wanna get him a breakdancing mat.
but i have no idea where to get it =[
we'll see.

27th= kasama outside performance and joveys church
april x.x

may x.x

june....



OMG.

ahh, life.



i feel the strong need to...
blog.

i will post another in a bit.
=/


oh !
to add on.. cuz this is random.
i am really losing it x.x


uhm,
i realized how much i like blogger/blogspot better than tumblr.
because..
everyone reads/uses tumblr.
and not many people read this.
and if they do. it shows they care [=
cuz they go outta their way to read something about me
like ateh sheryl and kuya jeff and rosa [depending]
and idk who else really.
i like knowing they care :D

i think my mother disowned me.

because i didnt want to go to church today.

now shes mad at me,
doesnt want to give me rides, cook me food, talk to me.

so i screwed my life over..
because i didnt want to go to a place where i dont feel like i belong.
a place where im forced to sit there... -.- and listen.
a place where i dont feel comfortable.


im not hating christianity. or anything.
i just.... dont enjoy going to church.
its boring and i feel out of place.

ur not supposed to force people to go anyway.

she freaking gives more allowance if u go to church.
so my freakin brother gets paid to sit there.
with her.


i guess its a filipino thing,
to be religious and all..

but i dont feel the need to be religious.
as long as im a good person.
i think im fine.

but she things im evil.
like im some sort of evil... thing.
and she doesnt want anything to do with me.

just because i didnt want to go to church.



is this fair?

because i have my own opinion about things.
im shunned.
..by my own mother.


but i guess thats how life goes right?

i wish i could just go back to work on sunday mornings.
instead of having wake up 'early' and sit there and listen.
and feel... bored and out of place.
[yes im repetitive because... its how i freakin feel]


gee thanks mom.
if u think ignoring ur daughter will bring u closer to God.
go ahead and do it.





but even the prodigal son came back,
in time.

and if that even ever happens.
i wonder if ull even care.

p. thoughts[continued]

im confused.

i had a talk with L
and ...
this is getting more... blah every time.

cuz like...

yea
i used to like u
and u used to like me.

but it was blah because of.. 'kira'
and ..

now we're like super awesomely close friends.
id say best friends.


and u asked me to prom.
and i said yes.
at that moment.. i sorta felt something.
but i have no idea wat im really feeling.

because,
i told L, and i told him not to tell u
but i feel like im over him...
uknow... because of alota reasons.
i still care about him.. as a friend [sorta] not even really sometimes.
but yea,
not LOVE him anymore.

i dont think about him alot.
i lost the dogtag. and i ... dont really care.
and im getting tired of sleeping with this teddy bear.

i wanted to go out and make another teddy bear [=
but idk wen thatll happen.

u shall be Wik.
because its so hard to always put 'you....'youyouyouyou
rawr.

and yea.
L. told me u think i really really like u.
and i have no idea if u feel like thats a good thing or... a bad thing.
u know,
if u want me to like u..
or...
u dont want me to like u

we sorta talked about it before
but yea.
u said u thot of me as a really really close friend.
so i guess thats ok.

i dont mind.

in the end, i wouldnt mind if we stayed friends like this or ... kinda went further.
id still be happy either way.

but as i have said before
we'll see. =/


only time will tell?
we're still getting that teddy bear tho =P



but... i havent told u a couple of things.
like,
about Natao.
and AHo

but its cuz... it shouldnt really matter.
im not too interested in them... as much as u
but... not like that.
gah,
its confusing.


yea.....

so im going to prom.

and only....
SRL<3
jovey
'kasama officers' -jasmine, stacey, matthew, kuya aj +[jovey]
reuben
and denise know.

interesting.

'only' x.x
oh, and luat and ashley...
blah. not sure who else.
justin and alex? idk
=/


this'll be interesting.
this will significantly change something.
i feel it.
but...
yea,


Luat.
we'll see!!!