not wat i planned,
nothing i couldve imagined,
a day i never wish to go thru again,
a realization,
something different,
inevitable,
cold,
horrible,
stupid,
a day i wish i hadnt gone thru; but thankful that i did,
weird,
a day i learned... ALOT,
a day i wish i could stay home and not see anyone and not do anything,
important and unimportant at the same time,
a day ill always remember,
not like tuesday; it wont make it into the history books,
a way for me to learn ...,
indescribable,
a day i could write about in a short story; and people would be so into it, that they wouldnt want it to end.
and today was;
...
the day it got really cold after really nice weather.
the day that there was sub for jenson,
the day that my 'friends' didnt honestly REALLY seem to give a shit.
the day i walked away from them.
the day i wanted to find peace in music.
the day i played piano at lunchtime in a room full of annoyingass people.
the day mr schroder [spelling?] walked into the room.
the day he turned my music upside down.
the day he told me that i should read it,
the day he told me that IF I WERE A MUSICIAN, I CAN READ IT.
the FIRST day i doubted my own musical knowledge.
the day i thot to myself, that i wasnt good enough,
the day i thot to myself, that i didnt deserve boston.
the day i thot to myself, that boston was and always will be a dream
the day i almost quit.
the day that i had NO ONE to go to.
the day that i knew i couldnt speak to anyone about it
the day i knew, no one truly understands anyone,
the day i cried in the bandroom.
the day my nose started bleeding as i wept,
the day my hands were covered in my own blood.
the day the droplets of blood hit the bandroom floor, as well as myself.
the day i ran out of the room with eyes full or tears and hands full of blood.
the day i ran into a bathroom full of girls grooming themselves, i washed my face and got paper towels,
the day i left blood on the bathroom floor.
the day i forgot to relax during a nosebleed.
the FIRST day this year that i actually got one, [iALWAYSgetthem...its'normal'forme]
the day i ran out of the bathroom and back, to the bandroom, sobbing and tearing my eyes out.
the day i wanted dennis to see me like this,
the day i wish he could hug me again and tell me it'll all be ok, and tell me that he believes in me and tell me that hes here for me and he cares.
the day i let go.
the day that the sub asked me if i wanted to just stay in the back office and relax,
the day mr schroder [spelling?], instead, took me to the office
the day we talked about wat really was bothering me,
the day a faculty member, told me it was ok for me to relax and get a 3.5 instead of a 3.9 or 4.0
the day even HE said i could raise that much money.
the day i learned a couple things about the new VP
the day i sat in the nurses office alone, for about 30 min thinking
the day i got a pass to currans class,
the day i didnt really want to be in school
the day i thot no one really cared if i was there or not.
the day that eric found my hamtaro.
the day that he carried some of my stuff.
the day that i tuned most people out.
the day in spanish that made me feel a little better, its always in spanish.
the day that i lost in 13 2x in a row, thanks nathan -.- and jeff o.o.
another day kasama practice was fckin ugh...
another day my mom refused to pick me up.
the day i didnt really want to talk.
the day i didnt want to take any bullshit from anyone.
the day i had extreme family problems, fck not even the day, more like the month.
the day i sat alone waiting for a ride.
the day i was quit and didnt turn on the radio the whole ride.
the day i didnt eat wen i got home.
the day i wanted to tell someone and talk to someone about this.
a day ill see rosa at 5:30 because of that.
a day that is not over yet.
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..can suck, if you think its unfair. but really. it can be beautiful.
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